Stop Letting Anxiety Run Your Life: Therapy for Lasting Change

Anxiety has a way of hijacking your inner world. The racing mind that won’t let you sleep. The tension that lives in your body—shoulders tight, jaw clenched, stomach and chest braced for impact. The constant worry, over and over again, about how things might go wrong—or about what may already have gone wrong: that conversation earlier in the day, the email you sent, the thing you wish you hadn’t said. Even when you’re getting through your day, there’s often a sense that something is about to fall apart.

Person sitting by a window, looking out with a thoughtful expression — reflecting inner experience of anxiety and worry.

Outwardly, you may seem capable. You meet your responsibilities, perform well at work, show up for friends and family. But inside, it feels like you’re fighting to hold it all together. There’s little room for calm, much less joy. Your mind loops endlessly over mistakes, fears, and imagined futures. You might even judge yourself for feeling this way: “What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I just let it go? Other people don’t seem to struggle like this.”

When anxiety takes over, life can start to feel smaller and more claustrophobic. You might avoid certain situations, second-guess decisions, or turn to reassurance-seeking or numbing behaviors. Over time, numbing yourself to cope can leave you feeling more cut off—from people, experiences, and even from yourself. Over time, this can erode your confidence and your trust in yourself.

How Anxiety Affects You

Many people with anxiety tell me they live in a constant state of hypervigilance—mentally rehearsing worst-case scenarios, replaying conversations, over-apologizing, or scanning others for signs of disapproval. It can feel exhausting trying to manage every interaction or decision just right. And the more you try to control the anxiety, the more trapped you can feel inside it.

Anxiety shows up in many ways—physically, mentally, and emotionally. You might notice:

  • Muscle tension, headaches, digestive problems

  • A racing or pounding heart

  • Difficulty sleeping or waking up with dread

  • Constant overthinking and mental fatigue

  • A tendency to avoid situations that feel risky or uncomfortable

  • Excessive self-criticism and perfectionism

At its core, anxiety is a protective response. It evolved to help us survive danger. But when your nervous system becomes stuck in high alert, anxiety can arise even when you’re not actually under threat—and it can color how you see yourself, your relationships, and the world.

Why Anxiety Persists

Many of the ways we naturally try to manage anxiety—avoiding triggers, over-preparing, seeking reassurance, suppressing uncomfortable feelings—can actually keep the cycle going. These strategies may provide temporary relief, but they tend to reinforce the belief that anxiety is dangerous or unbearable.

Close-up of a person’s hands clasped tightly, reflecting inner tension and anxiety.

Often, anxiety has deeper roots. Past experiences—such as childhood dynamics, relational wounds, or unresolved trauma—can shape the ways your nervous system responds to stress. Sometimes anxiety develops as a way to protect against painful emotions or unmet needs. Over time, these patterns can become automatic.

Understanding why anxiety persists can help you develop new ways of relating to it—with more curiosity, self-compassion, and flexibility.

How Therapy Can Help You Relate to Anxiety Differently

Effective anxiety counseling isn’t just about learning coping techniques—it’s about helping you shift how you experience anxiety itself. Together, we work to:

  • Build awareness of your patterns and triggers

  • Learn how to stay connected to yourself even in the presence of anxiety

  • Loosen the grip of avoidance, self-judgment, and rigid control

  • Work through underlying emotions and experiences that fuel anxious responses

  • Foster greater flexibility, resilience, and self-trust

The goal isn’t to "get rid of" anxiety—which is a natural part of being human—but to help you relate to it in a way that no longer runs your life.

Types of Anxiety I Treat

I work with adults facing many forms of anxiety—generalized anxiety, panic attacks, social anxiety, performance anxiety, and the lingering effects of trauma-related anxiety. Many of my clients are high achievers, professionals, parents, or caregivers who appear outwardly successful but feel overwhelmed on the inside. Whether you’re struggling with chronic worry, severe anxiety symptoms, or patterns of perfectionism and self-criticism, therapy can help you move toward greater ease and self-trust.

My Approach to Anxiety Therapy

I offer an experiential, relational approach to anxiety treatment. I draw from experiential dynamic therapies (including ISTDP and AEDP), Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), Internal Family Systems (IFS), and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), always tailoring therapy to your needs and pace.

This work often involves both:

  • Immediate tools to help you find relief and manage anxiety symptoms in daily life

  • Deeper exploration of the emotional and relational patterns that contribute to anxiety’s hold on you

Our sessions create a space where you can work through difficult emotions, discover what your anxiety is trying to protect you from, and gradually build new ways of responding—both in your inner world and in your relationships. Over time, you can move through life with more calm, clarity, and freedom.

Why It’s So Hard to Do This Alone

If you’ve spent time reading about anxiety symptoms or trying self-help strategies, you’re not alone. Many people work hard to manage anxiety on their own—but despite their efforts, the old patterns often persist.

Adult and child walking on a forest path, symbolizing movement forward and connection during life transitions.

That’s because anxiety is often driven by deeper emotional and relational dynamics that can be hard to shift without support. A skilled anxiety therapist can help you recognize blind spots, identify outdated protective mechanisms, interrupt self-reinforcing cycles, and begin to experience feared emotions in new ways—all within a safe, supportive space.

Therapy also helps you counter the isolation that often accompanies anxiety. When you have a place to bring your fears and struggles without shame, it becomes easier to shift your relationship with them—and in turn, to shift your relationship with yourself and others.

Take the Next Step

Through this work, many clients find they’re able to stop living life around their anxiety. They reconnect with the parts of life they value most—relationships, creativity, purpose, spontaneity. They feel more grounded in their own decisions and more connected to others. If you’re ready to explore how therapy can help you move in this direction, I invite you to reach out.

 

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